I visited the “City of Love” alone – and found a different love that I had not expected

Paris is known for its romance and is accompanied by tens of thousands of marriage proposals at the Eiffel Tower every year. It is no wonder that the city is also called the city of love.

The French capital gained its reputation in the 19th century, when artists and writers such as Victor Hugo and Honoré de Balzac joined forces for the era we now call Romanticism. The movement rebelled against the formalities of Neoclassicism and developed a newfound interest in the expression of personal feelings.

At that time, literary evenings were very popular among the middle class and later introduced words such as “rendezvous” and “je t’aime” into the European vocabulary.

And today, in the present, the romantic association of Paris, with its elegant buildings, charming streets, sultry bars and love of the arts, is still strong.

Given the unwritten pressure of a visit with a Special personParis might not immediately spring to mind as a solo travel destination. I have visited the famous city many times, but never alone. I too initially felt the urge to hold someone up so I wouldn’t feel out of place.

Instead, I romanticized my solo life and set out to explore the city from a different perspective—and ironically, I fell in love, but not in the way you’d expect.

Located in the 15th arrondissement, the Hôtel Beauregard is a six-story Haussmannian building with 38 rooms. Designed by Chloé Nègre, an India Mahdavi graduate and one of this year’s AD 100, the hotel combines classic and contemporary elements with a retro 70s touch.

With views of the Eiffel Tower and a Wes Anderson-style restaurant, Hôtel Beauregard is the latest addition to the hipster hotel chain Touriste.

The chain places great importance on guests “getting out of their comfort zone” to experience other lives and “being comfortable with occasionally feeling thrown off track before reclaiming parts of themselves that they sometimes thought weren’t there.”

And that’s exactly what I did.

Hotel Beauregard

The idea that Paris is only for lovers is far from reality. Quite the opposite: Parisians are experts at being alone.

I read in cafes, dined al fresco, drank wine, visited galleries, and exceeded my step goal. It led me to realize that deliberately going out with yourself is one of the most romantic gestures you can make. Even with public displays of affection at every turn, not once did I feel like I was missing out.

This may sound a bit self-centered, but loneliness has almost become a lost art.

We spend most of our “free time” making social plans, battling dating app fatigue, and desperately trying to stay busy. But if you cut all ties to the things you think You need, you learn to love your own company, time and freedom. It becomes almost addictive.

Being alone also takes you out of your comfort zone. I found myself putting the world to rights with locals, discussing everything from French culture, politics to their hatred of Emily in Paris and exaggerated stereotypes – one of which is that the French are rude. They are some of the friendliest people I have ever met.

Traveling alone can be one of the most empowering experiences.

“We learn to trust our instincts, become more confident in our decisions and seize opportunities that can push personal boundaries toward growth,” said Jordan Dixon, psychosexual psychotherapist and sociologist at the Thoughthouse Partnership, Indy100.

“I think we can all learn from solo travelers the importance of viewing ourselves as an important relationship in our lives. Solo travel adventures can help us feel loved, safe, important and cared for, and help us break away from seeking fulfillment of these goals solely in romantic relationships.”

Traveling alone goes against “social conditioning to prioritize romantic relationships” and the idea that “romantic relationships are the ultimate success and goal in life.”

Jordan believes that such pressure and expectations can come from sources such as “Religion that creeps into family, culture and government policy and is then amplified in the media, movies and music.”

This can often hinder many life experiences as people feel that they need to perform certain activities in order to be in a healthy relationship.

Hotel Beauregard

There is something poetic about being alone in the city of love – especially as a woman, as it goes against traditional gender norms and “love narratives.”

Some friends, partners and family members come and go, but you always stay – which raises the question: Why is it so hard for us to value ourselves and appreciate the time we spend with others as much as we do?

French existential philosopher and feminist activist Simone De Beauvoir argued that many women had been socialized to see themselves from a male perspective and had been raised to put others before themselves.

“Solo travel can offer women freedom and help them overcome unfavorable and restrictive lifestyles based on their gender,” explains Jordan. “The world is our oyster and we have many options that go beyond romantic relationships.”

Even though I have never found love in anyone else and never intended to, I believe that living alone is the epitome of self-love.

“Once our understanding of ‘love’ blossoms within us, we can break free from ‘attachment’ to others,” Jordan continues. “When we accept and understand ourselves on a deeper level, we can be freer and be truly authentic.”

She added: “When we learn to do this with ourselves, we can change our relationships with others and we can begin to accept people as they are, rather than projecting onto them what we need or what we think they are or are not. We we can avoid unfair expectations and commitment difficulties in our relationships with others.”

“If we can shift our attention away from trying to figure out who we are in the eyes of a partner first, it can really help us know who we are so we can begin to truly see the person in front of us.”

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