Food for thought: The best and worst of eating at the golf club

Derek Clements shares his thoughts on the dining experience at golf clubs over his years of service and recent experiences. While many golf clubs are doing a great job, he asks if more needs to be done at some clubs when it comes to dining options.

Food, delicious food! Or maybe not…

If you read my letters regularly, you’ll know that golf club food is one of the things that makes me so passionate about our sport. When it’s good, it can be outstanding, but when it’s bad, it can actually ruin your golfing experience. It’s 2024 – there’s no excuse for bad or overpriced food.

Despite the weather earlier in the season, I’ve played a lot of golf and visited a few courses this year. Firstly, I have to say that the courses I’ve played on have generally been in great condition, despite the challenges of an unusually wet winter and spring.

But the quality of the food is still inconsistent and I cannot for the life of me understand why.

To avoid embarrassment for everyone involved, I won’t name the worst offenders, but if you’re reading this, you’ll know who they are and hopefully be able to look into the issue.

In April I arranged a round with a friend I hadn’t seen for a while. We had a lot to talk about and decided to spend a day at a fairly well-known golf course. The weather was dry and the course was what we expected, with decent greens and lush fairways. It was a good experience, punctuated by a lot of laughter – we even managed a few decent shots and holed a few putts.

After packing our clubs in the car and freshening up, we headed to the clubhouse for lunch.

To be honest, the menu looked pretty appetizing. Not particularly cheap, but everyone is facing rising costs, so you grit your teeth and bear it.

We both ordered the “Pie of the Day,” which was billed as homemade steak and ale with puff pastry. Mmmm…

With a pint of beer in hand, we sat down and started chatting. As we were talking, I heard a loud “ping” coming from the kitchen. I’ve seen enough episodes of Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares to recognise the sound of a microwave. And I also know that Gordon Ramsay rightly disapproves of it. It’s lazy – and it means the food can’t possibly be fresh.

Seconds later, our food arrived – probably three minutes after we ordered it. The plates were placed in front of us and as I moved mine closer, I almost burned my fingers. The plate was scalding hot, a sure sign that it had come straight out of the microwave. The dough was hard and the meat was steaming hot – uncomfortably hot. It actually burned our tongues.

We were both hungry, so we fought through and ate as much as we could. When we were finished, a waitress came over, collected our plates and asked if we had enjoyed our meal.

“These cakes are advertised as homemade, is that true?”

“Yes love.”

“Were they heated in the microwave?”

“I don’t think so. They’re all freshly made.”

This was either clearly not true or she genuinely didn’t know. Either way, the £16.95 we paid per person was a complete robbery – and none of us will be returning.

There is a club in Norfolk where one of my closest friends is a member. This year his annual subscription has gone up from £1,200 to £1,500 without a word of explanation. I played with him on his course recently and it was in absolutely excellent condition. The same cannot be said for the bar prices – at the end of our round a pint of beer cost me £8.50. I’m sorry but there is simply no excuse or reason to charge golfers such an outrageous amount.

I recently played at Diss Golf Club with the guy who now pays £1,500 for his golf game. It’s a highly underrated golf course. I must also tell you that I will be coming back not just for the golf but for the food – the menu was extensive, the food was really home cooked and good value for money. It was delicious. And two pints of beer cost us just over £8.

Earlier this year I returned to Scotland, the country of my birth, and spent some time on the shores of Loch Tay. I had the absolute pleasure of playing at Killin Golf Club, a nine-hole golf course that will stay with me for a long time. Despite only having one greenkeeper, the course was in really excellent condition. The golf course was dirt cheap.

And the food was the best I’ve ever had at a club – EVER! Instead of the usual clubhouse food, we were treated to an incredible selection of Indian food. And it was so good that a clubhouse that had previously struggled to get people through the door was now attracting hordes of people.

I used to be a member of a golf course in Suffolk which was excellent in every way except the food.

I remember one team game. We were told we would get ham, egg and chips at the end of the round – traditional golfer’s food. We were charged £15 each, as was the visiting team we were playing against. Our ham, egg and chips turned out to be a slice of ham, overcooked fried egg and chips so overcooked I thought I’d broken a tooth when I bit into them.

This golf club used to regularly serve sandwiches made with stale bread. It became something of a running joke.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Sheringham Golf Club on the Norfolk coast does it right, with offerings like homemade sausage rolls and, watch out, crab and lobster caught from the sea just below the course, as well as locally farmed lamb, beef, venison, pork and poultry. Not surprisingly, locals are regular visitors – and made to feel welcome.

If you go out to eat and the food and/or service is bad, complain. If we want our golf clubs to improve the overall standard of the food they serve us, we should all do the same. You’ll get the message. Maybe!