SAG actors go on strike and join Hollywood writers. What should we do now? Read?

I have a quick message for television and film companies like Netflix, Disney, Amazon, and Warner Bros.: reach into your embarrassingly deep pockets and pay the striking writers and actors IMMEDIATELY, before a work stoppage in Hollywood forces people like me to either read a book or face the gruesome horrors of the world around us.

I am not joking.

The last thing you Scrooge McDucks want to deal with is an American population deprived of the television and movie entertainment that assuages ​​our miserable existence. So help me, if we start thinking about humanity’s slow march toward extinction, we’ll never hear an end to it.

For those who find themselves distracted by spending hours watching streaming series and movies, here’s a hint: The Writers Guild of America has been on strike since May 2. On Thursday, the Hollywood actors’ union, SAG-AFTRA, announced that its members will picket on Friday, effectively shutting down all U.S. television and film production.

Writers and actors are striking over equal pay in the streaming era

It is the first time since 1960 that writers and actors have gone on strike at the same time. The demands are clear and, in my view, reasonable.

The era of streaming series and movies has increased the demand for content, but pay for writers and actors has not kept pace. Additionally, streaming series have shorter run times than traditional TV series, meaning writers and actors earn less while also having larger gaps between jobs.

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A Los Angeles Times analysis found that the average compensation of top Hollywood executives rose 53% between 2018 and 2021, while screenwriters’ salaries “remained virtually stagnant.”

Warner Bros. CEO David Zaslav received a compensation package of nearly $247 million in 2021. Netflix co-CEO Ted Sarandos’ salary “rose 32% last year to $50.3 million … despite significant programming cuts and hundreds of layoffs this year,” according to the Times.

Writers and actors are also rightly concerned about the advance of artificial intelligence and want assurances that they will not be displaced by AI.

Why are actors and writers so mean to executives who only make tens of millions of dollars a year?

Studio bosses didn’t say much, presumably because they were busy with routine maintenance on the moats of their summer castles, but what was said wasn’t exactly great.

An unnamed executive told Deadline: “The end goal is to delay things until union members lose their apartments and homes.”

If a screenwriter were to write this section of dialogue, it would be rejected on the grounds that it was “too predictably cruel.”

Just a quick note: AI-powered robots are going to kill us. Okay, bye.

Disney boss Bob Iger opens his mouth and puts his foot in it

Next to a fountain of liquid gold (probably), Disney CEO Bob Iger – who has to be careful when he speaks because sometimes money just shoots out of his mouth – said the writers and actors are “just not being realistic” and commented on the strike: “It bothers me a lot.”

You want to know what’s going to be disturbing, Mr. Iger? The moment when I run out of new shows or movies to watch and have to spend more than 15 seconds thinking about the state of the planet because the only thing left to distract me is a book I’ve avoided reading for the past three years while I gleefully watched brilliantly written and acted movies and television shows. THAT will be disturbing.

Have you seen what the world looks like outside of our TV and movie screens? It’s a fucking nightmare. Part of the country is on fire, part of it is almost underwater, there’s an entire political party that keeps using the word “woke,” guns practically grow on trees that don’t burn, the Eagles are on tour for some reason, and everything is just Katawampus.

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What should we Americans do to distract ourselves from the chaos we call everyday life? Go to the library? DO YOU KNOW US?!?!

Studio bosses, pay your writers and actors, otherwise you will have to answer to us, the unentertained

No, if you think your writers and actors going on strike is “disturbing,” just wait until we the people realize our favorite shows are being postponed. There will be torches and pitchforks for you if you don’t get dragons, zombies, vampires, superheroes and whatever else shining right in our eyes.

So listen up, all you entertainment giants and studio bosses. Take a small portion of your trillions and do good to the people who actually bring our much-needed entertainment to life. It’s a simple matter of fairness. And if that means you can’t hire anyone to clean up one of your money-filled moats this season, then so be it.

Follow USA TODAY columnist Rex Huppke on Twitter @RexHuppke and Facebook facebook.com/RexIsAJerk

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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Will an actors-writers strike shut down Hollywood? But what about my shows?