Lead from values, not emotions

My friend Jen (not her real name), who runs a government and PR team for an energy company, texted me.

“SOS. I need your help. Do you have 5 minutes?”

When we spoke a few hours later, she told us how politically polarized her team was and extremely distracted by the current political situation. One team member had become so nervous that she had to take time off work.

“We have a team meeting tomorrow and I don’t know what to tell them to focus on the work we need to do. Honestly, I need help myself. This is crazy,” she said.

It seems like a lot of people are feeling like Jen right now. If you’re one of them, here are a few suggestions to help you get through this stormy time and come out stronger.

Be guided by your values, not your emotions.

Across America, the dramatic events of the past few days and weeks have stirred many strong emotions. That is what being human is all about. But if we do not control our emotions, they can lead us to act in ways that, while they may give us a short-term sense of security or superiority, can ultimately be counterproductive, if not harmful. They destroy trust. They damage relationships. They destroy our courage. They destroy values ​​that we could otherwise contribute.

Of all human emotions, fear is the most powerful and primitive. Fear narrows our thinking, drives us into ideological echo chambers, and blinds us to other possibilities. In doing so, it can lead us to act in ways that ultimately make us less safe and more vulnerable to greater threats. So it’s not about not feeling emotions, but about not being guided by them.

I encouraged Jen to acknowledge the strong emotions her team may be feeling, but also to remind them: Emotions are information, not instructions. They give us information about how to process what’s going on, but they don’t have to take the wheel.

“Remind your team of the values ​​you all share,” I said, “like integrity, respect, excellence and trust.”

Friction is not a bad thing. In fact, the best decisions come from high intellectual friction and low social friction. Without them, we cannot sharpen our ideas. What is not helpful is letting emotions dictate actions, not values.

ForbesLeading in uncertain times: Six ways to master the unknownFrom Dr Margie Warrell

Get back to the goal

“Remind everyone of the higher purpose you serve,” I said. “Go back to basics. Why is it better for anyone if your company does what it does? Remind them of that.”

The same applies to individuals as well as to teams and institutions. What is the highest purpose You are we trying to serve? Purpose is a direction, not a destination, and a transformative force of value creation that broadens our perspective. When we are purposeful, we are less likely to be distracted and better able to manage our resources – talent, time, teams – in ways that take us to a higher place.

If we lack a goal or deviate from the goal, we are the “effect” of our circumstances. If we act “goal-oriented,” we are the “cause” of their improvement.

Act from the certainty of yourself

Uncertainty abounds right now. But the truth is that we’ve never had certainty. We just like to think we have certainty. So embrace it. But be aware that uncertainty can lead us to turn predictions into “fear predictions” by imagining the worst-case scenarios, which only increase our fears, dumb down our thinking, and prevent us from using our creativity and agency.

The more “unknowns” are outside of our control, the more important it is to focus on what we know is within our control. No matter what uncertainty you face, make a conscious decision to focus on what you are most certain about – the kind of person/colleague/leader you want to be, the impact you want to make, and the values ​​that will shape your future…however it unfolds.

When you act on the basis of your self-confidence, it not only strengthens you, but also gives everyone around you a feeling of security.

In the midst of storms, oak trees take deeper roots. In the midst of this turbulent time, anchor yourself in the values ​​that should guide the way you lead yourself and others. Let your values ​​guide you, not emotions.

Margie Warrell, PhD, is a leadership consultant, keynote speaker, and bestselling author. Pre-order her new book The courage gap. Cconnect to LinkedIn