Nicolas Cage’s surfing masterpiece is sold to studios famous for “American Psycho”, “Dear White People” and “John Wick”!

“I would never tolerate hate speech or promote political violence in any form.”

Let’s be honest. Surf rock and surfing go together like… oysters and elaborate accessories. I was at a Danish restaurant recently and the waiter asked if we wanted our oysters raw or garnished. I immediately said “raw”. Others at the table looked at me and said “garnished”. I shrugged, they had won, the oysters tasted weird and everyone knew it wasn’t a perfect combination.

Do you love Dick Dale?

Exactly.

In any case, Australian surfers were excited when the very funny actor Jack Black announced that his band Tenacious D would be visiting the proverbial Down Under. Tickets were sold out in droves, Australian surfers got ready and then…

… a lone gunman shot former US President and current US presidential candidate Donald J. Trump.

You certainly know the story, Thank you, the Queen of the Pipelineand tragic, etc., although Jack Black’s Tenacious D bandmate Kyle Glass apparently misjudged the mood in the room.

At the tour’s stop in Sydney and immediately after the assassination, Glass was presented with a birthday cake because it was his birthday. When asked what he wanted, he replied: “Don’t miss Trump next time.”

Black, a paragon of virtue, immediately took to social media to explain, “I was completely blindsided by what was said at Sunday’s show. I would never condone hate speech or encourage political violence in any form,” and promptly canceled the rest of the tour. He stated, “After careful consideration, I no longer feel it is appropriate to continue the Tenacious D tour and all future creative plans are on hold. I am grateful to fans for their support and understanding.”

Surfers on the Gold Coast, Bells Beach and Margaret River cry into their ice-spiked white wines.

Glass, for his part, immediately threw himself on his sword, declaring: “I do not condone violence of any kind, in any form, against anyone. What happened was a tragedy and I am incredibly sorry for my serious lapse in judgment. I deeply apologize to those I have disappointed and deeply regret the pain I have caused.”

But the damage has been done.

A little-known Australian politician ranted: “I call on Prime Minister Anthony Albanese to join me in denouncing Tenacious D, Jack Black and band member Kyle Gass, and I call on Immigration Minister Andrew Giles to revoke their visas and deport them immediately.”

It is not yet known whether the visas have been revoked, but the tour has definitely been cancelled.

Peak Victoria Bitters.

But here’s a question for you: Would you turn against a friend of decades because of an inappropriate joke?

Yes, of course.

Yes?